I wonder how someone who enjoys going to bookstores, toy stores, playgrounds and occasional trips here and there could also thrive getting stuck home. Maybe it’s because we’ve been discussing the virus since January, so any updates about lockdowns isn’t a surprise anymore. 

Still, I know it’s tough for her. She only asked about wanting to go with me in the grocery three times. And our city’s attempt to have a new normal on Monday doesn’t mean that this little girl will be going out anytime soon. So, before everything turns into a blur, here’s a letter to my little adventurer who thrives in the most uncertain time.

Photos and videos were taken on Mother’s Day 2020

Dear Kerriroo

It’s been 83 days since you went to other places other than the garden at the lobby. And I could only imagine how hard it is to understand what’s been happening around you. We’ve always enjoyed window shopping in the mall, borrowing toys (and returning them before leaving the toy store), driving to school and then suddenly we can’t do any of it anymore. You’ve mastered how to beg for sparkly clothes, toys and books you like. It was getting harder to convince you to return the items sometimes. And believe me, I understand how much you miss those hotdog pretzels, eating the hotdogs and leaving the pretzels for me. 

OUR TINY HOME BECAME YOUR EVERYTHING

Since we couldn’t go out like we used to, I’ve generally been okay with how you’ve been transforming our home into a playground. You’ve turned our living room into a zoo, playground, mall and sometimes you would build your estate from boxes. But I’ve enjoyed it more whenever you transform it into a dance floor. By this time, you’ve mastered several dance moves and have built a playlist of your favorite Just Dance songs. You’ve become so good at it that you’ve created a mini-game you called “Guess the Dance!”. But our home isn’t just an all play place; I created mini areas for learning too. You have a space for arts and technology, a table for building Legos and our study area in the bedroom. Our entire home turns into a race track if you feel like riding your scooter or bike and sometimes you would challenge us to race each other.

WE SAID GOODBYE TO WUZI

This month has gone a little bit more challenging since we lost your first pet fish. There’s no other way to take your mind off it which was a bit worrisome especially when you’ve already been asking about what “passing away” means. I didn’t know how to tell you the terrible news. I cried to the thought of you getting sad. But I’m glad how you can go through the process and express your feelings calmly as you say: “I really miss Wuzi, Mom. Let’s get a new fish?” to which I replied: “Too soon, amore.”. You didn’t ask anymore, so I guess you understood why.

SOMETIMES I FORGET THAT YOU’RE ONLY 4 YEARS OLD

You’ve told me how much you miss the playground several times. At times you would ask if we could revisit the zoo. But whenever I remind you about the coronavirus you’d say: “Aw…” and return to your toys. It was never difficult to reason with you; maybe it’s because we had a major discussion about current events since last year. Some may say you’re too young for these things, but your dad and I believe otherwise. I’ve never underestimated your ability to comprehend things but tried to keep things as simple as possible, and because of that, you’ve grown to understand more about the world.

“O oh! Human! Got to put back my mask.”

Kerrigan Wintour

This coming week our city will begin its new normal. Businesses like malls, restaurants and offices will reopen slowly. Unfortunately, we can’t go out anytime soon even though you have grown comfortable wearing your mask. Seeing other people prompts you to wear back your mask and say: “O oh! Look a human!”. It’s a bit alarming and quite sad, but we’ll take care of that once this COVID-19 is over.

Because of the pandemic, our road trips and travel adventures became more meaningful. I’m glad we have photos and videos of fun memories to look back to, so, hang in there, Amore. Let’s keep the fun at home for now.

Once the world is much safer, you and I will go on a field trip again.

🤎 Mom

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